Your Ideal Dog According To Your Star Sign
The stars have spoken.
In the market for a BFF? One that will never talk (only bark) back, give you plenty of hugs and yes, occasionally barf on the floor, but will always be loyal no matter what?
If you answered yes to all these questions, we have good news!
Either your human-friend bar is suuuper low, or you’re destined for a doggo!
We’ve scoured the stars to suss out your ideal pet, so sit back and scroll to your ‘scope.
Dog ownership can be a rough (get it?) time for the not-so-humble Aries.
As future leader of the free world, you’re sure to run in guns a-blazin’ and steadfast in your executive decision to get, um… that one! Yes. That one!
With a hot head and what some may call ‘full-on’ demeanour, a dog that would take well to commands is not only recommend but probs the only way you two can be chill.
Obedient, strident and high-energy, the Border Collie will ensure your daily power posing has that certain ‘je ne sais quoi’ and their need for big walks should help calm your fire.
Or, you know, spur it on. Either/or.
You’ve never met a snack you didn’t like Taurus, and while many may think this makes you perfectly suited for a Lab, take a step back ‘cause there’s another breed the stars* have in mind for you.
And it’s the Boxer.
The Boxer, much like you Taurus, gets on great with kids, is playful, loyal and… good lawdy, stubborn AF.
While there’s every chance the two of you could become stuck in a perpetual standoff, we feel the need to make some changes by showing you the error of your bullish ways. ‘Cause it’s annoying during those weekend IKEA trips mmkay?
And if you still disagree, that’s fine – we knew you would.
*Us with a crystal ball from The Reject Shop.
As a Gemini, you know better than to spout off about your horoscope status. In fact, at this point the phrase ‘two-faced’ brings on a whole-body frown.
But forgot all that! Lean IN to that melting pot of personalities Gem. And what better way to say, ‘My stereotype is only half right’ by embracing the dog world’s two-faced equivalent?
Yes. We’re slingin’ you a mixed breed.
A Shihpoo (Shih-Tzu cross Poodle), much like you, enjoys the best and worst of competing traits. A lack of shedding, love for cuddling and low exercise needs will keep things chill, but a tendency to bark at the doorbell will drive you nothing short of nuts. ‘S’all about balance.
And the next time someone puts out a warning for ‘Gemini season’ just show ‘em your adorable fluffball. That’ll stop them.
You’re a needy one Cancer, but it’s cool if you know it right? With a desire for hugs and platitudes, the Cancer sign needs a loyal pet (aka no cats, ever) who is always down for a Friday night chill sesh and okay with an absent pet while you scroll through inspo quotes on the ‘gram.
We’ve found the ideal pooch and as the cool kids say, “These hoes ain’t loyal. But Rotties are.”
Fiercely backing their humans, and honestly just overgrown lapdogs masquerading as badasses, the Rottweiler is the perfect companion dog for Cancers. Especially when they can’t get through for their daily chat with Mum.
Mercury’s second moon has entered your water axis Leo… or, you know, something like that. Look, it’s super complicated but essentially, it’s time you got a dog.
You’re used to tooting your own horn, oh-so-smug Leo, so having a pooch take a little patch of limelight will probably do you some good.
And what better attention seeker than a Siberian Husky? They’re stubborn, independent and jovial so you’ll hate their ability to steal that hard-won spotlight at first – but realise they’re adding to your whole shtick after a time.
You have high standards, Virgo. You’re fastidious, boast attention to detail that some call ‘OTT’ but you know is just the proper way of things, and are generally just a smarty-pants.
A fur-heavy dog would be the biggest faux pas since not a speck of dust gets past you, so the sook lookin’ Bloodhound is the pooch for you.
Gentle, dedicated, and with a sniffer that can’t be beat, the Bloodhound has an attention to detail that will give you the warm and fuzzies*.
You’ll probably train your Bloodhound to hunt down those who use the wrong ‘your/you’re’. Ridding the world of bad spelling and grammar, one woof at a time.
*Ugh, no fuzzies. Where’s the lint brush?
An infinite loop of indecision may stop you from even getting a dog, dear Libra, but by golly, we’re going to try.
We know your type Libra; you’re romantic, charming and balanced, so an equally charming Toy Poodle is just the ticket.
A reliable pooch and one with a notorious habit of detaching, you’ll work hard to earn the love here, but that’ll just fill your days more. After all, you’ve already changed your mind about three other social events this week, and that calendar needs filling.
With a rising lunar equinox and Mars in its 8th house, there’s no better time to bring home a pupper.
Or is it takeaway grub?
Either way, you’re walking through that front door with something.
Strong-willed, ambitious and a wee bit possessive, you need a pooch partner whose movements you can predict.
A sassy Schnauzer should do the trick, mirroring the fierceness that lays - at all times - just below your surface.
As a commitment-phobe who’s likely to jet off at a moment’s notice, you, dear Sag, need a pet who will be chill with the not-so-occasional dog sitter.
A pug with its mischievous nature and great sense of humour, will love the Sagittarius’ penchant for adventure, but just as easily win the heart of any dog sitter should the need arise.
You’re often the odd man out of the horoscope game Cap, but anyone who’s met you knows your ambition and discipline knows no bounds; you’ll be included in this list even if it means a scowl.
The stars command thee to turn thy frown upside down, Capricorn. And what better way to add some bounce to your life than with an Old English Sheepdog?
A floofy ball of fun, the Sheepie is enthusiastic, bootylicious and in need of lots of cuddles. Next time you’re feeling moody, pessimistic or shy, remember that a Sheepie could fix it all.
A mixed bag of qualities with a fixed air sign that ensures you’re frequently referred to as strong, independent and okay fine, maybe a bit aloof; a dog is the perfect grounding force for you, Aquarius.
A Saint Bernard – aka Beethoven – with their loving, placid demeanour and social attitude will ensure you get to stretch your friendly ‘tude but also remind you to embrace folks beyond a surface-level “Hello”.
They also have a tendency to drool which you’re just going to have to get over, Aquarius.
You lead with your heart Pisces; with empathy, a selfless attitude, and sensitive approach all not far behind.
A Labrador, ridiculously friendly and with a built-in need for speed, will remind you to be kind to yourself and maybe get you out of the house for a walk when you’re being a bit ‘fishy’ and suffering from emotional overload.